59 Sam Levenson Quotes On Success In Life

Samuel Levenson was an American humorist, writer, teacher, television host, and journalist. This Sam Levenson quotes will motivate you.

Best Sam Levenson Quotes

  1. “For Attractive lips, speak words of kindness.
    For lovely eyes, seek out the good in people.
    For a slim figure, share your food with the hungry.
    For beautiful hair, let a child run their fingers through it once a day.
    For poise, walk with the knowledge that you never walk alone.
    People, more than things, have to be restored, renewed, revived, reclaimed and redeemed. Remember, if you ever need a helping hand, you will find one at the end of each of your arms.
    As you grow older, you will discover that you have two hands, one for helping yourself and the other for helping others.” ~ Sam Levenson
  2. “Don’t watch the clock; do what it does. Keep going.” ~ Sam Levenson

  3. “You must learn from the mistakes of others. You can’t possibly live long enough to make them all yourself.” ~ Sam Levenson
  4. “The reason grandparents and grandchildren get along so well is that they have a common enemy.” ~ Sam Levenson
  5. “The reason God made man before woman was that he didn’t want any suggestions.” ~ Sam Levenson

  6. “People, more than things, have to be restored, renewed, revived, reclaimed, and redeemed.” ~ Sam Levenson
  7. “Life begins at forty, but so does arthritis, and the habit of telling the same story three times to the same person.” ~ Sam Levenson
  8. “We may not always see eye to eye, but we can try to see heart to heart.” ~ Sam Levenson
  9. “Siblings: children of the same parents, each of whom is perfectly normal until they get together.” ~ Sam Levenson
  10. “You don’t have to be in “Who’s Who” to know what’s what.” ~ Sam Levenson
  11. “Insanity is hereditary; you get it from your children.” ~ Sam Levenson

  12. “Never lend money to a friend. It’s dangerous. It could damage his memory.” ~ Sam Levenson
  13. “It’s so simple to be wise. Just think of something stupid to say and say the opposite.” ~ Sam Levenson
  14. “Just try to be happy. Unhappiness starts with wanting to be happier.” ~ Sam Levenson
  15. “One of the virtues of being very young is that you don’t let the facts get in the way of your imagination.” ~ Sam Levenson
  16. “I’m going to stop putting things off, starting tomorrow!” ~ Sam Levenson

  17. “We should not permit prayer to be taken out of the schools; that’s the only way most of us got through.” ~ Sam Levenson
  18. “It was on my fifth birthday that Papa put his hand on my shoulder and said, ‘Remember, my son, if you ever need a helping hand, you’ll find one at the end of your arm.'” ~ Sam Levenson
  19. “Courage is walking naked through a cannibal village” ~ Sam Levenson
  20. “It’s not the sugar that makes the tea sweet, but the stirring.” ~ Sam Levenson
  21. “If you owe fifty dollars you’re a piker; if you owe fifty thousand dollars you’re a businessman; if you owe fifty million dollars you’re a tycoon; if you owe fifty billion dollars you’re the government.” ~ Sam Levenson
  22. “Give your child a spanking once a day. If you don’t know why he does.” ~ Sam Levenson
  23. “If you want to kill time why not try working it to death.” ~ Sam Levenson

  24. “If your wife wants to learn to drive, don’t stand in her way.” ~ Sam Levenson
  25. “If you die in an elevator, be sure to push the Up button.” ~ Sam Levenson
  26. “Lead us not into temptation. Just tell us where it is; we’ll find it.” ~ Sam Levenson
  27. “The longest word in the world is “a word from our sponsor.”” ~ Sam Levenson
  28. “Learn from other people’s mistakes. Life is too short to make them all yourself.” ~ Sam Levenson
  29. “Our toaster has two settings: too soon or too late.” ~ Sam Levenson

  30. “When I was a boy I used to do what my father wanted. Now I have to do what my boy wants. My problem is: When am I going to do what I want?” ~ Sam Levenson
  31. “If you want to know how your girl will treat you after marriage, just listen to her talking to her little brother.” ~ Sam Levenson
  32. “Many wise words are spoken in jest, but they don’t compare with the number of stupid words spoken in earnest.” ~ Sam Levenson
  33. “I admit that: my wife is outspoken, but by whom?” ~ Sam Levenson

  34. “Happiness is a by-product. You cannot pursue it by itself.” ~ Sam Levenson
  35. “The simplest toy, one which even the youngest child can operate, is called a grandparent.” ~ Sam Levenson
  36. “A woman’s place is in the home. Why should she go out and take away a workingman’s pay instead of staying home and stealing out of his jacket like a good wife.” ~ Sam Levenson
  37. “I’m gonna put all my money into taxes. They’re sure to go up.” ~ Sam Levenson

  38. “The chaplain of the Senate does not pray for the Senate. He watches the Senate and prays for the country.” ~ Sam Levenson
  39. “How wise are Thy commandments O Lord. Each one of them applies to somebody or other I know.” ~ Sam Levenson
  40. “You must pay for your sins. If you have already paid, please ignore this notice.” ~ Sam Levenson
  41. “The whole world is watching America, and America is watching TV.” ~ Sam Levenson
  42. “Any beast can cry over the misfortunes of its own child. It takes a mensch to weep for others’ children.” ~ Sam Levenson
  43. “You can’t start at the top.” ~ Sam Levenson

  44. “One antidote for sexual truancy lies in simply teaching youth the wonder, the miracle, the reverence for the creation of life itself. Life is a divine creation. You don’t take chances with creation.” ~ Sam Levenson
  45. “Somewhere on this globe, every ten seconds, there is a woman giving birth to a child. She must be found and stopped.” ~ Sam Levenson
  46. “When I came home and showed my mother my report card with a mark of 98 in arithmetic, she wanted to know who had gotten the other two points.” ~ Sam Levenson
  47. “What we should have fought for was representation without taxation.” ~ Sam Levenson

  48. “Democracy means doing whatever you want without asking permission of anybody but your boss, your doctor, your lawyer, your landlord, your bank, your city, your state, and federal authorities, and your wife and children.” ~ Sam Levenson
  49. “It’s a good thing that when God created the rainbow he didn’t consult a decorator or he would still be picking colors.” ~ Sam Levenson Quotes
  50. “Any kid who has two parents who are interested in him and has a houseful of books isn’t poor.” ~ Sam Levenson
  51. “It would be useless to bomb Washington. If you destroy one building, they already have two other buildings completely staffed with people doing exactly the same thing.” ~ Sam Levenson
  52. “The American success formula is first to get a home of your own, then to get a car of your own so you don’t have to stay in that home of your own.” ~ Sam Levenson
  53. “There was an old Woman who lived in a shoe She had so many children Her government subsidy check came to $4,892.” ~ Sam Levenson
  54. “At the U.N., any nation that fights back is censored as an “aggressor.”” ~ Sam Levenson

  55. “The high IQ has become the American equivalent of the Legion of Honor, positive proof of a child’s intellectual aristocracy…. It has become more important to be a smart kid than a good kid or even a healthy kid.” ~ Sam Levenson
  56. “The Puritans came to America to worship in their way and to force everybody else to do the same thing.” ~ Sam Levenson
  57. “Times don’t change. Men do.” ~ Sam Levenson
  58. “The beauty of America is that the average person always thinks she is above average.” ~ Sam Levenson
  59. “More and more Congressmen now stay in Washington all year-round because they can’t stay at home under the laws they’ve passed.” ~ Sam Levenson

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