Best Kleenex Quotes On Success In Life

These Kleenex quotes will inspire you. Kleenex is an absorbent disposable paper tissue.

A collection of motivating, happy, and encouraging Kleenex quotes, Kleenex sayings, and Kleenex proverbs.

Famous Kleenex Quotes

  1. “It’s just another of Robin’s sayings. Like, ‘Holy strawberries, Batman, we’re in a jam! Or, Holy Kleenex, Batman, it was right under our nose and we blew it!” ~ Karen Marie Moning
  2. “I love being manipulated by what I see. I love weepies and romantic comedies where you’re reaching for the Kleenex at the right moment.” ~ Nick Cave
  3. “Men should be like Kleenex, soft, strong and disposable.” ~ Cher
  4. “The earth is a used Kleenex on the universe’s nightstand.” ~ Colin Quinn

  5. “If there is no God, who pops up the next Kleenex?” ~ Art Hoppe
  6. “I went to a funeral recently, and they handed out Kleenex before the funeral. Which I thought was cocky.” ~ Mike Birbiglia
  7. “I haven’t left the house without a packet of Kleenex in my back pocket for as long as I can remember. Whenever I start thinking I’m incredibly cool, the packet of Kleenex in my back pocket brings me right back down to earth.” ~ Josh Radnor
  8. “But you’re so helpless sometimes. It’s like watching a kitten with its head trapped in a Kleenex box.” ~ Rainbow Rowell

  9. “[With “Summer Sisters” the publisher] sent me on a big book tour. And it was the most wonderful professional experience of my life. I mean it was like Kleenex on every table wherever I was, friends patting friends on the back and they’d cry and I’d cry.” ~ Judy Blume
  10. “Say no more,” Leif interrupted. “I understand. I will simply have to kill them all myself.” -“There he goes again. I’m telling you, Danny Elfman would love to get hold of those lines.” -“Not John Williams?” -“If you’ve got some hopelessly overmatched heroes fighting evil and some Imperial types marching, John Williams is your guy. You need a song to make people reach for a box of Kleenex, talk to Randy Newman. But if you want creepy atmospherics and spine-shivering chords to back up your casual death threats, you gotta bring in Danny Elfman.” ~ Kevin Hearne
  11. “I am a futility. The life of prayer begins with that. And God is not a comfort, to be offered like Kleenex. God is a poisoned sea, with broken syringes washing up on the beach. God is shopping malls stretching to the horizon and warplanes in the sky. God is a flat tire in a rainstorm and beer cans in the ditch, a bottle shattered on a highway and the taste of gunmetal in your mouth.” ~ Tim Farrington
  12. “How can a nation be called great if its bread tastes like kleenex?” ~ Julia Child

  13. “Just how could a nation often be great if it’s bread tastes want Kleenex.” ~ Julia Child
  14. “Amen,’ I exclaim, accidentally spitting out a Raisinet. I pick up the chocolate with a Kleenex and stuff it in my purse. Ten bucks says a month from now I’ll have forgotten about it and will finally have said heart attack when I assume a rat shat in there.” ~ Jen Lancaster
  15. “After applying foundation and a little blush, dust your face with translucent powder, then mist skin with a rosewater spray and lay a Kleenex over for a second. It makes your face seem flawless in a way that looks as if you aren’t wearing any makeup.” ~ Liv Tyler
  16. “I learned just by going around. I know all about Kleenex factories, and all sorts of things.” ~ Anne, Princess Royal

  17. “Depression is all about if you loved me you would. As in, if you loved me you would stop doing your schoolwork, stop going out drinking with your friends on a Saturday night, stop accepting starring roles in theater productions, and stop doing everything besides sitting here by my side and passing me Kleenex and aspirin while I lie and creak and cry and drown myself and you in my misery.” ~ Elizabeth Wurtzel
  18. “Good call. A second drag and your next stop’s the wastepaper basket – and not to toss your kleenex, true.” ~ J.R. Ward
  19. “Leo took out a pen and autographed the arm of one of the nymphs. “Narcissus is a loser! He’s so weak, he can’t bench-press a Kleenex. He’s so lame, when you look up lame on Wikipedia, it’s got a picture of Narcissus—only the picture’s so ugly, no one ever checks it out.” ~ Rick Riordan

Comment Your Favorite Kleenex Quotes Below!

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We love to write about our experiences to motivate and inspire the lives of people we touch. We believe when you succeed we succeed with you.

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